RESULTS...

I have had a very frustrating couple of weeks.. I am writing this today simply because so many of my friends are asking WHAT is going on!

 I started November 10th with LUMPS in my hips/thighs. These have spread to my ankles - arms, etc.  I have been to see several physicians.  I had a biopsy taken of one of the nodes on November 15th.  I was told my results would be back the 19-20th but that was not TRUE!   Results did not come back until Monday the 26th.  It confirmed what the dermatologist had suggested - that I had ERYTHEMA NODOSUM.

ERYTHEMA NODOSUM is an infectious/inflammatory process that usually manifests itself in the legs.  It usually is the alarm the body gives off saying there is some sort of process going on inside the body.  I saw a different dermatologist on Tuesday morning the 27th.  He was not willing to call this process SARCOIDOSIS - which was the first initial thinking.  I had blood work drawn that morning - they took about 6-7 vials.   CT scans were scheduled for Wednesday the 28th.  I drank a quart of contrast Tuesday evening and another quart before I got to imaging yesterday at 11 am.   Once I was there I was given an IV to accommodate the contrast they injected while I was in the scanning room.

Scans were taken basically of my entire torso.  Lungs, liver, spleen, aorta, kidneys, etc.  I received results of most of the blood work yesterday.  Most everything was normal but the sed-rate was very high which means - there is an infectious process going on inside my body!  NO KIDDING!!!

I called down this morning as I was told the results of the scans would be in the SYSTEM within 24 hours.  I was told the results - most all the scans are clear.  There are TWO lesions in my right lung.  The radiologist listed it as "metastatic lung cancer" but what you need to know is this - He DOES NOT KNOW that I have a process going on in my body.  Sarcoidosis also shows up looking the very same.  So I was referred immediately to the pulmonologist (lung doctor) at 2 pm this afternoon.  He read through all the results - saw my LEGS which are definitely red and LUMPY!  It looks like I have HUGE red bruises all over my legs - so on and so forth!  He is not willing to call it sarcoidosis.  He DOES NOT like contrast on the CT scans.  He was not willing to call it cancer.  When I was finished Dr. Bott called me who had been monitoring the visit with the pulmonologist.  Dr. Bott is the cancer specialist who has been following me.  He was watching as the notes were written by the pulmonologist.  He told me he wished he could tell me I was perfect but he cannot.  He said he felt however, as though I would be around in 20 years.  That was good news but ALL was way too much for me and I cried and cried.

This is the deal.  Needless to say - my colonoscopy was once again cancelled for tomorrow.  YAY - I need to get that now on the 6th of December.  On the 10th I  will have full pulmonary function tests.  On the 13th I will have a HIGH RESOLUTION CT SCAN once again - with NO CONTRAST of my lungs.  This pulmonologist did not like the contrast!  Everything looks white and he could not give a definitive diagnosis.  I will see the pulmonologist once again on the 18th and hopefully it will be clearly definitive.  This is what I need and this is what I am praying for.

I was able to read what the radiologist said - which immediately made me cry!  Dr. Bott says it is way too soon to have metastatic lung cancer.  With the infectious process going on it is a wait and see game. 

I am thinking positively.  Despite taking many different immune boosters, some recommended by lots of my friends, my immune system is STILLhighly compromised.  I am anemic - I though I had rebounded from that but NO - I am still really anemic so I will take supplements for that.  I have been very tired but I get up - get ready WITH my makeup every day, and I don't take NAPS!  I keep going and going until it is time for bed. 

I WANT TO BE NORMAL which makes me laugh out loud as I even write that because I AM NOT NORMAL!!  I don't even know what NORMAL is but I have always NOT BEEN NORMAL!  I don't even KNOW if there is NORMAL!  I just want to be well - healthy and move on with my life.  This is holding me up  - just for a LITTLE WHILE.  My friend Pres. Kenison said it is a small BUMP IN THE ROAD - If only he could SEE my bumps  HA HA  - I believe this to be true.  I can overcome this - I refuse to believe I have lung cancer and I am thiniking positively.  I  know positive thinking is HEALTHY.  I WANT TO BE  HEALTHY!  I have tried to get rid of any negative at all in my life.  I don't want to hang on to anything negative.  ALL positive for me!

So my friends - this is where I am tonight.  AND instead of clear liquids today Bubba is taking me to dinner tonight.  I NEED to get out and I am THANKFUL to be OUTTA HERE TONIGHT!!!

I would ask for continued prayers.  I need them.  I will also tell you this.  Yesterday as I laid on the table getting my CT scans - I had tears streaming down my face.  I felt very ALONE while lying there but I had a strong feeling that I was NOT ALONE!  That was the reason for my tears.   I KNOW I am being watched over.  Not just by ANGELS on this earth - but by ANGELS on the other side of the veil.  I KNOW IT - I FEEL IT and I TESTIFY OF IT!

I am GRATEFUL for so many things.  I am NOT excited about my path for the next few weeks - BUT I ALSO HAVE FAITH - I do not believe there is ANYONE who has more FAITH THAN I DO!  I also have lots of HOPE.  Today I felt that I had been knocked down but I am back up already.  You get knocked down and you keep getting back up again and again and again.  I am BACK UP!!  All six feet of me!!!  My SPIRIT will NOT  be crushed! 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  Those who have known a problem first hand are usually better able to help others walking through the same difficulty!  I am HERE for anyone who needs me.  I have tried to be positive and help those who are going through some of the same things I am.  I VOW to do that for the rest of my days.

"BRAVE YOUR STORM WITH FIRM ENDEAVOR
   LET YOUR VAIN REPININGS GO!
HOPEFUL HEARTS WILL FIND FOREVER
  ROSES UNDERNEATH THE SNOW"

Please continue to pray for me and my family.  We pray daily for those who pray for us.    LOVE AND HUGS TO ALL  - GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!