HAPPY ANNIVERSARY........

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO KERM TODAY!!  37 WONDERFUL years!  I can hardly believe it has been that long - the first 36 years seemed to FLY by - the last year has been PAINFULLY slow but there is still so much to be GRATEFUL for!
I am so THANKFUL today for my husband - Kerm Jackson, aka BUBBA!  I truly consider myself very BLESSED to be his wife and I also feel BLESSED that he is my husband.  He is a GREAT man - and has been an AMAZING husband.  There really are not words to express how I feel about him other than to say I truly love him!  He is a patient, kind and loving man.  He has truly supported me in all my endeavors and has encouraged me to FLY!  And fly I have!  I am so thankful for the loving support and tender loving care he has rendered in my behalf!

Tonight we will go to dinner and to an EARLY showing of Les Mis which is scheduled to come out Christmas Day!  I truly LOVE the story and I am excited for tonight - the movie starts at 9 pm!  This morning bright and early came the ring at the door with my beautiful flowers!  December 19th was such a magical day to get married - right before Christmas and I LOVE the day!  My wedding bouquet had pine boughs with red roses and red carnations and Karen J Florals made the bouquet today just as beautiful!  If you are ever in need of a truly AMAZING lady to do your florals - let me know and I will get you connected with her.  She does BEAUTIFUl work!!

The last two weeks have been a whirlwind of tests and doctor visits and more test.  I had a pulmonary function test at Timpanogos Hospital last week with a High Resolution CT scan of my lungs at the Imaging Center at Central Utah Clinic.  I found out results yesterday and today.  I saw the pulmonologist yesterday - I have nodules in my lungs - and with the symptoms I have had the last six weeks it makes sense that it is the sarcoidosis.  That being said, because I HAD cancer - it makes them concerned for what possibly could be there.  I saw Dr. Bott my oncologist today.  Both physicians feel that the explanation of the nodules in the lungs is the diagnosis of sarcoidosis - especially since I had it before.  They cannot rule out cancer but that would be a second explanation.  Dr. Bott felt, with a fair amount of certainty, that the first explanation is in fact the correct one.  I have had scarring in my lungs for 29 years - I don't think  there is anything that has changed!    However, it is not clearly definitive - I have to see him again in three months and get new CT scans in four months and see the pulmonlogist.  I am praying hard that there will be no change and that I can just continue to live my life and get on with it.  I have FAITH and I feel that  ALL IS WELL.  I feel GREAT!   My blood counts are up today - I am no longer anemic.  I had a colonoscopy two weeks ago - the first since my cancer diagnosis November 30, 2011.  ALL WAS WELL and I don't have to do THAT again for two years.

So with this news I am truly GRATEFUL for TODAY!  I am GRATEFUL for my time on this EARTH!  I feel blessed to be here and to have the strength and energy as I did before any diagnoses!   I am going to live my life to the FULLEST and aid and help others in any way I can!  I have so much left to do on this earth and I am GRATEFUL for TIME to be able to do those things I find necessary and helpful.

Today I spent a few hours at Freedom Academy where grandchildren Simone and Lukas go to school.  I helped in Lukas' class to help make snow globes and I played the piano for the Christmas Carols.  How THANKFUL I am for my talents - for my ENERGY and for the fact that I can help in the classrooms once again as I did when my children were younger!  It was a WONDERFUL experience.  How I LOVE my grandchildren.  Simone, Lukas, Stella and Charlotte!  We are truly BLESSED.  They are BEAUTIFUL spirits and have so much to offer.  I am so GRATEFUL!

I am THANKFUL to be at the end of this year - So THANKFUL for my current health and the return of my energy!  It has been a long year but I have learned so much.  I will talk about some of the things I have learned in my next blog.  I am THANKFUL for energy to SHOP!!  It was almost ONE FULL YEAR with no shopping because I simply did not have the ENERGY or even the desire to go out and shop.  Now I dress up and feel like the ME of OLD and I just cannot begin to express the GRATITUDE!  Who would think that a little thing like SHOPPING would make such a difference???

Please continue to pray for me and my family.  We pray nightly for those who pray for us.  There is so much for ALL of us to be GRATEFUL for.  There are so MANY who need our prayers!  I love that we can ALL bear the burdens of one another and that we can help those in need.  ]

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  There is a scripture in Philippians in the Bible that in short says this:

"Do not be anxious about ANYTHING, but in EVERYTHING, by prayer and petition, with THANKSGIVING, present your requests to GOD.  And the peace of GOD, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Jesus Christ". 

So THANKFUL for my SAVIOR and the ability to present requests to GOD and for the answers and blessings I receive DAILY!

GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!!   LOVE AND HUGS!!!!!!!!!

RESULTS...

I have had a very frustrating couple of weeks.. I am writing this today simply because so many of my friends are asking WHAT is going on!

 I started November 10th with LUMPS in my hips/thighs. These have spread to my ankles - arms, etc.  I have been to see several physicians.  I had a biopsy taken of one of the nodes on November 15th.  I was told my results would be back the 19-20th but that was not TRUE!   Results did not come back until Monday the 26th.  It confirmed what the dermatologist had suggested - that I had ERYTHEMA NODOSUM.

ERYTHEMA NODOSUM is an infectious/inflammatory process that usually manifests itself in the legs.  It usually is the alarm the body gives off saying there is some sort of process going on inside the body.  I saw a different dermatologist on Tuesday morning the 27th.  He was not willing to call this process SARCOIDOSIS - which was the first initial thinking.  I had blood work drawn that morning - they took about 6-7 vials.   CT scans were scheduled for Wednesday the 28th.  I drank a quart of contrast Tuesday evening and another quart before I got to imaging yesterday at 11 am.   Once I was there I was given an IV to accommodate the contrast they injected while I was in the scanning room.

Scans were taken basically of my entire torso.  Lungs, liver, spleen, aorta, kidneys, etc.  I received results of most of the blood work yesterday.  Most everything was normal but the sed-rate was very high which means - there is an infectious process going on inside my body!  NO KIDDING!!!

I called down this morning as I was told the results of the scans would be in the SYSTEM within 24 hours.  I was told the results - most all the scans are clear.  There are TWO lesions in my right lung.  The radiologist listed it as "metastatic lung cancer" but what you need to know is this - He DOES NOT KNOW that I have a process going on in my body.  Sarcoidosis also shows up looking the very same.  So I was referred immediately to the pulmonologist (lung doctor) at 2 pm this afternoon.  He read through all the results - saw my LEGS which are definitely red and LUMPY!  It looks like I have HUGE red bruises all over my legs - so on and so forth!  He is not willing to call it sarcoidosis.  He DOES NOT like contrast on the CT scans.  He was not willing to call it cancer.  When I was finished Dr. Bott called me who had been monitoring the visit with the pulmonologist.  Dr. Bott is the cancer specialist who has been following me.  He was watching as the notes were written by the pulmonologist.  He told me he wished he could tell me I was perfect but he cannot.  He said he felt however, as though I would be around in 20 years.  That was good news but ALL was way too much for me and I cried and cried.

This is the deal.  Needless to say - my colonoscopy was once again cancelled for tomorrow.  YAY - I need to get that now on the 6th of December.  On the 10th I  will have full pulmonary function tests.  On the 13th I will have a HIGH RESOLUTION CT SCAN once again - with NO CONTRAST of my lungs.  This pulmonologist did not like the contrast!  Everything looks white and he could not give a definitive diagnosis.  I will see the pulmonologist once again on the 18th and hopefully it will be clearly definitive.  This is what I need and this is what I am praying for.

I was able to read what the radiologist said - which immediately made me cry!  Dr. Bott says it is way too soon to have metastatic lung cancer.  With the infectious process going on it is a wait and see game. 

I am thinking positively.  Despite taking many different immune boosters, some recommended by lots of my friends, my immune system is STILLhighly compromised.  I am anemic - I though I had rebounded from that but NO - I am still really anemic so I will take supplements for that.  I have been very tired but I get up - get ready WITH my makeup every day, and I don't take NAPS!  I keep going and going until it is time for bed. 

I WANT TO BE NORMAL which makes me laugh out loud as I even write that because I AM NOT NORMAL!!  I don't even know what NORMAL is but I have always NOT BEEN NORMAL!  I don't even KNOW if there is NORMAL!  I just want to be well - healthy and move on with my life.  This is holding me up  - just for a LITTLE WHILE.  My friend Pres. Kenison said it is a small BUMP IN THE ROAD - If only he could SEE my bumps  HA HA  - I believe this to be true.  I can overcome this - I refuse to believe I have lung cancer and I am thiniking positively.  I  know positive thinking is HEALTHY.  I WANT TO BE  HEALTHY!  I have tried to get rid of any negative at all in my life.  I don't want to hang on to anything negative.  ALL positive for me!

So my friends - this is where I am tonight.  AND instead of clear liquids today Bubba is taking me to dinner tonight.  I NEED to get out and I am THANKFUL to be OUTTA HERE TONIGHT!!!

I would ask for continued prayers.  I need them.  I will also tell you this.  Yesterday as I laid on the table getting my CT scans - I had tears streaming down my face.  I felt very ALONE while lying there but I had a strong feeling that I was NOT ALONE!  That was the reason for my tears.   I KNOW I am being watched over.  Not just by ANGELS on this earth - but by ANGELS on the other side of the veil.  I KNOW IT - I FEEL IT and I TESTIFY OF IT!

I am GRATEFUL for so many things.  I am NOT excited about my path for the next few weeks - BUT I ALSO HAVE FAITH - I do not believe there is ANYONE who has more FAITH THAN I DO!  I also have lots of HOPE.  Today I felt that I had been knocked down but I am back up already.  You get knocked down and you keep getting back up again and again and again.  I am BACK UP!!  All six feet of me!!!  My SPIRIT will NOT  be crushed! 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  Those who have known a problem first hand are usually better able to help others walking through the same difficulty!  I am HERE for anyone who needs me.  I have tried to be positive and help those who are going through some of the same things I am.  I VOW to do that for the rest of my days.

"BRAVE YOUR STORM WITH FIRM ENDEAVOR
   LET YOUR VAIN REPININGS GO!
HOPEFUL HEARTS WILL FIND FOREVER
  ROSES UNDERNEATH THE SNOW"

Please continue to pray for me and my family.  We pray daily for those who pray for us.    LOVE AND HUGS TO ALL  - GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!

SHORT LIVED PEACE....

I am sick....AGAIN! This is what I will tell you. I can handle this. I would rather, once again, have it be me who is sick, than wish this upon anyone else!! I would NOT wish this upon my worst enemy. I actually don't think I have any enemies but if I did, I still wouldn't wish it for anyone!!

I felt as though I was doing so well. October was a HEALING month!! I came into November really feeling on top of the world !

We traveled to Las Vegas two times in the last month to visit and watch my two nephews play football. Their team is in the playoffs and I love every minute of watching them! I want to tell you a little about them. Blake Frischknecht is the oldest son of my brother Kurt who passed away in 2002 in a car accident. Blake had just turned 7. He is a kicker. This is his first year playing football as a senior kicker. He has played soccer since his daddy started him in the sport at age 3-4. He is coming to BYU to play soccer BUT I think BYU could use a KICKER for their football team!  When he kicks the ball off his kicks fly through the other team's goal posts!  His field goals are easily 50 yards!   His papa would be SO PROUD!  Chance McCutcheon is also a senior. He is the son of Ricky who my sister-in-law married a few years after Kurt's death. I love Ric like a brother and that is how I regard him. As my brother! Chance is a linebacker who plays his heart out!! I love these two boys and I am proud of them..  Anyway. These boys are brothers and this is the very amazing thing about them. They were both born the same day!!! May 10, 1995!! Brothers from a different mother!!! I love it! I love them!!

Last Friday I started feeling a little pain at the top of my outer thighs right below my hips. I felt as if they were both bruised. Saturday the pain was worse but I still felt as though I had somehow bruised my legs. By Sunday evening I had these "lumps" all over my upper thighs. Kerm circled 26 of them. The nodules are about an inch in diameter, hot and very painful. Except the ones I first felt. They are each about three inches in diameter, hot and painful. It hurts to move! By Monday the number of nodes had doubled. I saw Dr Bott my oncologist. He suggested a biopsy. By Wednesday I had over 100 and today they have spread down both legs, onto my ankles and now on my arms.  These are painful nodules which are red and hot!

I saw the dermatologist yesterday who took a nodule out of my arm with about a two inch incision. The biopsy results will be back Monday or Tuesday. If you have taken me off your prayer list I BEG you to add my name again. GOSH! I am a sick girl. I pray for the lessor or the three evils which are
1) Lymphoma which is another form of cancer
2) A disease called Sarcoidosis which I had 29 years ago and hopefully is the more likely cause or
 3) What they call Valley Fever.

When my youngest child Kelsi turned one I became very ill.  I had these same horribly painful lumps in my legs and finally had to use crutches. Kerm would carry me to and from the car. It was a rough time because I had four children - the oldest was 6!!'. It was really really hard.  A physician suggested an x-ray of my lungs and after a lung biopsy the disease Sarcoidosis was diagnosed. I was put on hugely high doses of steroids and eventually regained my health. As I left the hospital the physician told me to expect to gain great amounts of weight!   I did gain 10 pounds but lost it after finishing the medications.  This disease never goes away but usually it doesn't resurface unless the immune system is compromised. Well - mine has been very comprosed over the past year.  I am however, praying I have that PARTICULAR disease.  I have dealt with it before.  Originally 29 years ago they thought I had lymphoma until the biopsy came back Sarcoidosis. You can google the disease and read all about it. At that time it was in my lungs and they are permanently scarred but the scarring has never hindered me.  It can affect your heart and be fatal. It can affect your brain, cause blindness and I just don't even want to go into more details.   It is rare for a Caucasian person to perish from this disease.  The comedian Bernie Mac died a year ago from Sarcoidosis.  I have a great deal of FAITH.  I have been given blessings and one must NEVER ever underestimate my FAITH!!

I decided today that next November we need to go away for the whole month! My trials have been coming in Novembers and I don't like that!

What I will tell you also is this... I am THANKFUL!! I am thankful for trials because I will attest they make a person stronger. I guess the Colon cancer wasn't enough! I obviously need to learn more. I am a fast learner so just let me get it over with!!! Needless to say my colonoscopy was cancelled today. I still have that to look forward to!!!

PLEASE pray for me. I will find out my fate Monday or Tuesday and move forward in FAITH overcoming this new trial!! I CAN do it. I can handle the pain. The nodules are spread all over my ankles this morning but I can still walk and do the things i need to do!! I can handle anything as long as I know what I am dealing with!! A dear friend suggested this is just another BUMP in the road for me.  I have great HOPE!!

So here I go again with this new stepping stone. I will hurdle this one and be good as new. I still look the same and no one will ever quelch my SPIRIT. I am filled with GRATITUDE!!

Thought For The Day: I have nothing more to say other than I can't wait to see my grand babies. Hopefully we get a sleepover this weekend. Hug your loved ones and be GRATEFUL.  ANGELS truly attend all of us - On BOTH sides of the veil and I TESTIFY that this is TRUTH.  I FEEL their presence!!

 GOD bless us EVERYONE!!! Love and Hugs!!!

ALMOST A YEAR.....

I have not updated my blog for over a month!  I have taken the time I need to heal - both physically and mentally and I have had many many occasions to ponder my last year!  October was very good to me for which I am truly THANKFUL!!

I have healed almost completely and feel as if I am back to nearly 100%!  I was doing fine until Friday when I started feeling pain on both sides of my hips at the top of the femur.  I felt as though I had bruises on both sides.  Sunday evening I began feeling all sorts of BUMPS on the back of my legs - mainly above the knee.  These are red and sore nodules and I had Kerm circle the ones I had Sunday evening - the count?   26 nodes!!!  Not GOOD!   I saw Dr. Bott yesterday and he does not know what they are.  He has referred me to a surgeon to biopsy these nodes to see just what they are.  Last night they were more painful and there were MORE!  I have some on my lower legs now!  We will get to the bottom of these and hopefully I  will continue on my path to being completely healed!

As I said earlier, I have had a lot of time to reflect on the past year! I canoot begin to say how GRATEFUL I am for those people who supported and who continue to support me. 

I will be perfectly honest.  At the beginning of this EXPERIENCE, if you will, I had NO EXPECTATIONS!   I really did not expect anything from anyone.  It became discouraging however when I realized I did need huge amounts of support!  A few friends who I thought would be supportive through thick and thin - who I thought I could depend on no matter what - were NOT there for me. There were COUNTLESS others who stepped up and WERE there for me for which I am so thankful!! Those same friends who were not there for me, on a regular basis, remind me of how busy and important they are!  I feel extremely sorry for these people.  I am so THANKFUL for my own knowledge of being here on this earth to aid others.  That has been the story of my life!!  The bottom line here is that I don't care who you are - NO ONE is that busy or important!! I could NOT depend on those folks during the very most DIFFICULT year of my life, a time when I needed huge amounts of support and it was simply not there for me.  Like I said, I try not to judge as that is not my job.    HOWEVER - and this is a BIG however, I did realize who I COULD count on and I stayed focused on  those people and being POSITIVE because that is HEALTHY!!!! I needed to be positive in order to get better!!!

I promised I would be HONEST and you just got a dose of my HONESTY!!

Thursday I will have a colonoscopy and I'll be honest again!!! I am not exited. It brings back memories that I would rather just forget. That means today is my last eating day until after the colonoscopy. My choice for dinner will be Red Lobster. Tomorrow is a clear liquid day and then in the afternoon I have to drink that NASTY stuff AGAIN!!! Ugh!!

The one PERK if you will, of colon cancer -  and the surgery involved has been a 25 pound weight loss. TRUST ME - This is NOT something you  would ever want!   However, I  can eat whatever I want - and I will not ever gain weight again!  I am truly GRATEFUL to be alive and I am truly looking forward to this Holiday Season!  Last year was a BUMMER!! Literally!!

On December 14th I will have the six month scans of my liver, lungs and abdomen. I PRAY that those scans will be clear!  I cannot wait to truly enjoy the rest of the year with peace of mind!!

I have enjoyed the presence of my grandchildren. I LOVE them to the moon and back. It is such a tremendous joy to have them in our home! Simone, Lukas, Stella and Charlotte! The TRUE Lights in my life!! They are beautiful, loving and very smart!! They are growing into WONDERFUL human beings!  I  am thankful to Kami and Kelsi for letting us enjoy their children!!

During the last week I have basically redone our home! I have gone through EVERYTHING! I have cleaned out closets and drawers. I have moved furniture around and incorporated new. My house feels brand new and I am excited to have a brand new year and move on with my life!!!

Thank you to my supporters! Thank you for the prayers in my behalf and in behalf of my family! I still need those prayers. Thank you for the visits and the encouragement!! I am GRATEFUL! I have SO MUCH to be THANKFUL for this year!! It is very humbling!! Most of all THANK YOU to my husband. It brings me to tears to think about the support he has been to me!! Unbelievable!!!  I have learned SO MUCH!!

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  One of my favorite sayings ....
"What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult for each other"

"When your nights are filled with loneliness and your days are dark with discouragement - when you can't seem to read or pray or to do anything else - just sit still..  and let GOD love you". 

Thank you AGAIN for thoughts and prayers....  Love and Hugs!

THREE WEEKS POST SURGERY....

I haven't written since my second surgery. I have had an interesting three weeks. I have truly been blessed with so much. It is hard to express my feelings with mere words. I am GRATEFUL and I am BLESSED.

I mowed the front lawn today! First time since the second surgery. I feel good enough to do the back however I don't want to overdo it. The back takes twice as long as the front and Kerm ended up doing that.

I saw my surgeon on August 30th. I was very shocked when he suggested surgery the next day. At first I said OK. When I got home I called and told them I felt like it was all happening too fast. I suggested that we stick with the September schedule at which time I was informed that the September spot had already been filled and now we were looking at sometime in October. Well there was my answer. I hurried and got the house cleaned, did all the laundry and prepared for surgery the next morning - Friday August 31st.  My daughter Kamie made sure to call the hospital and hand picked once again the anesthesiologist and nurses who would be in the surgery with me.  I am so THANKFUL for her and for the HUGE help she has been through all of this.  Even though she is FAR AWAY in Ohio, we speak often and it doesn't feel so far. 

The surgery went very well. They reconnected everything and took out the port in my chest. Can I tell you how good it feels to have that thing gone???? Oh my gosh! I cannot begin to tell you how incredibly awful those four months were!!! The second surgery lasted an hour and a half and I recovered quickly.  Once again Kerm stayed with me the whole time.  Friday morning August 31st was the surgery.  We were there Saturday, Sunday, Monday (LABOR DAY) and came home on Tuesday.  The first week is a huge blur.   I know it took some time to readjust but  I have adjusted quicker than normal and I am extremely GRATEFUL.  I will see the surgeon again Thursday the 27th for my last follow up and the oncologist October 1st.  I am assuming he  will order scans and then I will have to do scans every six months or so.  I assume I an CANCER-FREE!   That is my hope and my prayer.

This last week I redid my computer room.  It was the last room in my house to have WALLPAPER in it.  I stripped the wall paper, painted, redid the curtains and got some new furniture.  It feels SO GREAT to be ALMOST normal and to  have the energy and strength that I lacked for so many months BACK!   Again - such great BLESSINGS.  I am THANKFUL!

We have Simone,Lukas and Stella staying over night tonight (Saturday).  These children indeed are the LIGHTS of my LIFE!   We went to the Mellor Ranch in Lehi today and visited with John and Kelsi and baby Charlotte.  I was able to snap a picture of ALL FOUR of my grandchildren!   They are delightful, fun, beautiful and a JOY to be with!!  We feek  so BLESSED to  be able to spend time with them all! 

I am gaining MUCH strength and energy.  I am able to do the things I USED to do.  I  feel a lot like the OLD me but I will never be the same again.  I have learned so much - I have been through so much and I have enjoyed many many BLESSINGS.  I truly  have had ANGELS attend me and CONTINUE to have Angels who attend me.  I am so THANKFUL.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:     MAY YOU HAVE.....
Enough happiness to keep you SWEET!
Enough trials to keep you STRONG!
Enough sorrow to keep you HUMAN!
Enough hope to keep you HAPPY!
Enough failure to keep you HUMBLE!
Enough success to  keep you EAGER!
Enough friends to give you COMFORT!
Enough wealth to meet your NEEDS!
Enough enthusiasm to look FORWARD!
Enough faith to banis DEPRESSION!
Enough determination to make each day better than YESTERDAY!

THANK YOU SO MUCH for your PRAYERS, FAITH in my behalf and KIND THOUGHTS and ACTIONS.  Please keep praying.  We pray for all those who pray for US! 

I am THANKFUL!   GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!   LOVE AND HUGS!!!!

GOOD NEWS DAY....

37 years ago today, August 28, 1975, Kerm Jackson asked me to marry him!! (It was just six weeks after his FORMER roommate had asked me to Marry Him)    Hard to believe how fast time has passed!  It has been an amazing ride.  Not always easy, but a huge learning experience.  I wouldn't trade all the ups and downs for all the rice in China!!   I LOVE HIM to the MOON and back!   Together we have created Eternal Memories!  I am THANKFUL!

FALL is in the air!! We spent some time Sunday at the Sundance cabin. If you look closely in the background you will see the start of the beautiful color changes announcing the arrival of my FAVORITE season! Gives me great HOPE!! Provo Canyon is changing and the colors are beautiful!!

Monday at 10:30 was the BIG appointment where Decisions were made. Since last week when my white blood count had fallen "in the toilet" at. 1.8 and absolute neutrophils were .63 I was actually a little SCARED!! I was told to wear a mask and stay away from people. Now I have been known to be SLIGHTLY rebellious. Those who truly know me know that YES -  this is true!!. NO mask for me and I went wherever I wanted to! 

I also had ALOT of people praying for me. I got a Facebook inbox from a friend in California. He said "even though we haven't met, I have been following your blog and I want you to know I'm praying for you". I am so THANKFUL for ALL of you who have been praying for me. Don't quit YET!! I still NEED you ALL!!

Monday my white count was back to 7.3. Huge upswing! Absolute neutrophils were 5.5. Actually on the high side. Such a huge BLESSING!! Dr Bott could not explain the counts which were run twice just to be sure last week. Could only attribute them to the chemo!! I BELIEVE in prayers! Thank you!!

I saw the urologist on Thursday the 23rd. My symptoms are NOT yet resolved. So Monday after much discussion Dr. Bott determined I was FINISHED with that NASTY chemo. After last week I had come to that decision myself and I truly felt that there was a reason for those low counts that confirmed my decision!!. Monday there were great discussions and agreements! I did not even have to beg. He immediately called Dr. Sklow at the Huntsman Cancer Center and surgery to reconnect is scheduled for Monday September 10th!! I am THRILLED!! Of course I want to do what is BEST but Dr. Bott has witnessed the suffering.  I

I know I am not the only person to have suffered with chemotherapy. However he told me in 30 years he has not seen anyone so incredibly sensitive to the chemo. Of course that would have to be ME!! The urologist said he sees my symptoms mainly in pediatric patients because they are so sensitive. I can only imagine if it affected me so much on the outside it had to kill any remaining cells. It has nearly killed ME !!'

We are moving quickly towards a more PLANT BASED diet.  I have a DVD sent by a friend which talks about better health with just a little diet change.  I don't think we have had a BAD diet  as we have both maintained our weight for 37 years!  I just think that we will try some of the alternative stuff we have been introduced to.  I don't think any of it will HURT! The fact is this - ANIMAL PROTEIN actually acts as a FERTILIZER for cancer cells.  I have never eaten a lot of red meat but we are adjusting our diets and I guess only time will tell!!  I will help anyone with this any day.  There are a lot of people who are NOT healthy.  I felt that I was extremely healthy - until November 30, 2011. 

So FINISHED I am!!  I did my BEST and endured the treatments as much as I could and I feel entirely at PEACE with the decisions made!  I got  up every day -  always put on my makeup, always did the normal activities of daily living - mowed the front lawn as much as I could and joked and laughed.   I feel that I have handled this CHALLENGE with COURAGE, GRACE and DIGNITY!!  I have tried NOT to complain.  Once I am able to mow BOTH front and back you will know I am BACK TO MY OLD NEW SELF!!  Our grandkids taught us a very SILLY game but we LOVE it!  Perhaps you have played BINGO!  When you see a yellow vehicle you call out BINGO!  We have had many many laughs over this game!  Bubba and I play every day.  I can usually beat the socks off of him but on occasion he will win.  Yellow Jeeps are worth more points - we just are keenly aware of ANY yellow vehicles!  CRAZY OLD PEOPLE!!!

I am anxious to get back to a NEW normal life.  Bubba and I even took a spin today on the bicycle built for two!  He was the one who got winded FIRST!  I cannot wait to recover and to go about my BUSINESS again!  YAY HOORAY!!

I cannot begin to express my Gratitude to my Heavenly Father for seeing me through these last few months.  I remember getting through June and wondering how in the world would I make it through those LONG HOT MONTHS OF JULY AND AUGUST!   Well here we are!  August 28th!  The month is almost finished.  September 10th will be my surgery and I will get back to normal.  I originally thought I wouldn;t be a candidate for that surgery until the October/November time frame so I am THRILLED!   I will have scans every six months to make sure all is well.  My last scan was June so in November it will be time for another.

I cannot begin to express my GRATITUDE to my MANY friends who have prayed for me and continue to pray for me.  I am not really finished - just with what I consider the BAD part!.  I still have a ways to go but I am getting stronger and will surely be better before TOO LONG!  Thanks to those in my family who CARE - who have kept up with my progress and have been in touch with Me!  Especially to my GIRLS - Kamie, Kelsi and Kami!  They have offered much support and they are amazing women and I love them to pieces.  Of couse I love the boys too and I too am thankful for them.  I am TRULY THANKFUL for my grandchildren who have been great distractions during this summer.  How THANKFUL I am for the time we get to spend with them.  Those times are PRICELESS!!  I am most THANKFUL and GRATEFUL for BUBBA!  He has been by my side the WHOLE TIME.  He has done his work from home and has been here to encourage and support me every step of the way.  Please continue to pray for me and my family.  Again I say to you - we pray for those who pray for US!!!

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  "Whether Seventy or Sixteen, There is in Every Being's Heart the Love of Wonder, The Sweet Amazement at the Stars and the Starlike Things and Thoughts, the Undaunted Challenge of Events, The Unfailing Childlike Appetite For What is Next and the JOY in the Game of Life"!!!

I am Joyfully looking forward to the Next Stage in my Life - The Next CHALLENGE.  I know there will be more and I am better equipped more than EVER to face what may come my Way!  \

Once Again - GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!!!   Love and Hugs from Me to YOU!!

Summer Staycation

This has been a summer I NEVER want to repeat!! We have been on STAYCATION - meaning - a walk around the block, watering plants in the yard - mowing SOME - canning peaches- etc. etc.  I would rather be at some of my favorite vacation spots - Jackson Hole - Lake Tahoe - Las Vegas - San Diego, just to mention a FEW!  I LOVE seeing the pictures people post on facebook of their favorite spots.  We do get to Sundance for dinner quite often which FEELS like a vacation! I don't even mind cleaning the cabin because of the absolute beauty at Sundance. 

I went to the doctor yesterday.- and they tell me I am a SICK GIRL!  HELLO - no kidding!  To be honest, I went for my appointment at 10 am with Dr. Bott to tell him I was going to be through with chemo because of the side effects I have that are NOT going away.  When you first go in they take your blood through the port in the chest.  They were ACTUALLY able to access it yesterday.  I attribute this to PRAYERS in my behalf!  I last had chemo July 30th which went on for three days.  The pump was taken off Wednesday August 1st - so it has been three weeks.  Last week they delayed treatment #5 because of my side effects which are still side effects!  I had made my decision to be finished simply because I do not want this to be permanent.  AND I know they say it is just a minute in time  - go for the long term but there has to be a QUALITY of living!  Every possible side effect that I have read about - I have had with this treatment.  I did much better in the spring with the chemo and radiation with the exception of the severe burning.

My discussion with Dr. Bott was lengthy.  My friend Marjorie passed away last Thursday and yesterday at 11 am was her funeral which I was dressed for and ready to attend.  I didn't make it and it made me sad.  I sat by her bedside last Tuesday and basically said my final goodbyes.  I told her I loved her and she was able to voice that in return. 

After going back and forth with Bubba involved in the conversation I asked Dr. Bott to look at the results of my blood work.  Last week the counts were low but good enough for more treatment.  So without having had chemo for three weeks - he was SHOCKED.  He said my counts had fallen to the TOILET!  Meaning - they are extremely low.  Last week my white blood count was 3.34 with normal being 4.5 - 11..0.   They are concerned about the absolute neutrophils specifically also.  I mean all the counts are low but last week the absolute neutrophils were 2.21 normal being 2.2 - 4.8.  So basically just low.  Yesterday my white blood count had dropped to 1.80.  The absolutely neutrophils had dropped to .63.  When the doctor saw that he said "You are a Sick Girl".  Even if you consented today we cannot give you treatment.  I had no idea the counts had dropped so low.  I have been tired but I have pushed myself because if you don't push yourself through this you might as well lay down and die.  Well GOSH - I guess I am CLOSE!

He advised staying away from PEOPLE!!!  I LOVE people!   They also advised a MASK!!  Well I am at home, I can walk around the block, I can walk in the yard and at least water the FEW plants I planted this year.  I did get some tomatos in and some squash and pumpkins before my surgery.  The garden is FULL of weeds but who cares?  Next year will be different - At least I am hoping and praying for a GREAT next year!

My decision is made.  Because my body is so sensitive to the treatment, perhaps I received enough in four treatments that most people get with eight.  I am finished.  My goal now is to get stronger because four weeks after the last chemo technically I could have surgery to reverse everything and be back to normal.  With counts like that - there is NO WAY.  I have to boost my immune system.  I have had SEVERAL people give me some thoughts and ideas and I welcome ALL.  My friends Craig and Nancy have given me some information which I am going to try.  My cousin's son Wyatt gave some information that could be helpful.  I am open and willing for ALL discussions.. I NEED and WANT to be better.  The chemotherapy has been very detrimental and I was willing to give it a shot because I want to be Cancer-free.  I feel deep down inside that that has happened.  I also knew deep down inside that I HAD it!  That is a story for another day.

So I will try to take it easy.  I still get up and get dressed with make up on because I feel lazy if I don't.  I am USED to working hard.  It is the HARDEST thing NOT to be able to do that.  There are certain things that I can do with a little rest in between and I just need to get STRONGER.  The lights of my life are my children and GRANDCHILDREN!!  HOW I LOVE THEM SO MUCH.  I NEED to be here for them and that is my goal.  We took Simone, Lukas and Stella to Church with us Sunday.  They are simply delightful and brilliant and beautiful.  We then were invited to Kelsi's for dinner and my only regreat is NOT taking a picture of Charlotte with the other three.  I will have to get that picture.

I am THANKFUL for another day on Earth.  I have work enough to do till the sun goes down!!  Each and every day.  I feel BLESSED.  I guess I am sick.  Besides being a little tired I thought I was OK.  I will work HARD to get back to my OLD self - of course the NEW OLD SELF! 

I could not do this without the support that I have received.  I am THANKFUL for ALL of you who offer comments - who pray for me - who do acts of service for me.  That is MY goal - I still serve each and every day.  Just not like I am used to doing.  PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE continue to pray for me and my family.  WE need it.  Again - I return that favor by praying each and every day for all those praying for ME!!  I BELIEVE in Prayers.  I BELIEVE in Angels and I know I am being watched over and taken care of.  THANK YOU.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  "Our DUTY is NOT to see THROUGH One Another - But to See One Another THROUGH".  Thank you for helping to carry MY burden.   I need you ALL!  I am here for anyone who needs help with their own burdens.   

Once again I say - GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!!  Love and Hugs!!!

I AM GETTING TIRED OF THIS...

My husband told me Sunday that I looked beautiful which made me HAPPY!! .... But.... There is always a But.... He said "You Look Worn Out"   DUH!!!

Today I head to the oncologist for treatment #5/8. I am going to have a long talk before I accept the treatment today. I AM worn out. I have had Every side effect that I could possibly have. I am concerned that there may be permanent effects!!

I have been telling the doctor that I had a urinary tract infection. Saturday August 4th I had terrible pain and Kerm nearly took me to the ER. I spoke with the doctor at about 10:30 that night. They always react as though I am CRAZY! I am TOUGH and I can handle A LOT but seriously -for once just believe me. I have never been a WHINER! I know my own body!! You can see a picture of just some of my medications. One counteracts another. It's ridiculous!!! There are more in my top bathroom drawer!!!! I HATE pills!!

Last Monday morning I went for a test. Was I surprised when it came back positive??! NO! I've had the infection just smoldering away since I came out of the hospital in May!! They started me on an antibiotic and by Thursday I was no better so I was given a new antibiotic. As of today MAYBE just MAYBE slight improvement. I have had a constant yeast infection. I mean enough is enough!!

There comes a point in time where enough may just be enough. I have done hours and hours of research. I am getting very tired if this. Trust me. I know many many people undergo chemotherapy and some seem to sail through it. I know many suffer immensely!! The radiation in Jan-Feb-March nearly killed me I handled the chemotherapy though. This time around it is far worse. So today I am going to take control of my situation and decisions will be made in just an hour or two!! If some of these side effects are permanent then I'm done. I can't live this way!! I've been told that a lot of times the cure is worse than the disease. I believe the cancer was gone at surgery. I know there are protocols but there is also OVERKILL!!

When I get ready in the mornings I do my hair and makeup. I have been seeing brown hairs in the sink. Last week my immediate thought was that "Bubba must be losing his hair". Too bad His hair is WHITE!! The hair is mine and yes it is thinning. It shocked me at first but I don't care about my hair. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being worst, it's a NOTHING. I just want to be done with treatment, have my surgery and get back to being ME!

It is a different ME! I am never going to be the same Bobby Jo Jackson. I have learned so much. I have been served by many ANGELS and for that I am eternally BLESSED and GRATEFUL. I will spend the rest of my life in the service of others. I have stayed positive and have tried to help others. I can tell you this is really HARD but a huge learning experience!!!

I am thankful for SUPPORT. I am thankful for prayers in my behalf. I can honestly say I feel them. I am BLESSED. I have an amazing husband. Through the years I have thought many times about how LUCKY I have been. I only knew him six weeks before we were engaged! Married just four months after that. He is not a man of many words. He is a man of genuine integrity, intelligence and GOODNESS!! He has truly been by my side through 37 years of marriage and raising four FIERCELY in dependent children!  He has been an amazing provider, husband and father. A GREAT example to many many people I am so THANKFUL for him and his unwavering support! He has always encouraged me to succeed and has literally been the wind beneath my wings!!

I am truly thankful for my children and grandchildren. They are such shining lights in my life. I love them more than words could ever express!! I count my BLESSINGS every day. I hope they are learning through this experience. I would hope this trial and suffering has not been in vain!!

Please continue to pray for me and my family. We need your prayers.  We will return the favor any time!  I would also ask you to pray for my friend Marjorie who I had spoken about many times.  Her husband has asked that we pray for her to leave this earth life peacefully.  She is in her last days on this earth.  She has been a HUGE mentor for me and I love her dearly.  Her life of service is one that should be emulated by all! 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  "Therefore Do Not Lose Heart.  Though Outwardly we are Wasting Away, yet inwardly we are Being Renewed Day by Day.  For Our Light and Momentary Troubles are Achieving for Us An Eternal Glory That Far Outweighs Them All. So We Fix Our Eyes Not on What is Seen, but on What is Unseen.  For What is Seen is Temporary But What is Unseen is ETERNAL". 

GOD BLESS US EVERYONE!  Love and Hugs

A LITTLE PIECE OF HEAVEN....Before Round #4

I started Round #4 yesterday!!  I just mowed the front lawn so I think I am doing well so far with this round of treatments.  The weather is cloudy and it is so pleaseant outside!  My favorite kind of a day!  Count your Many BLESSINGS!! 

I spent a few days this past week at a place I call "A LITTLE PIECE OF HEAVEN!! I had an extra week off of the chemo treatments to attend the Frischknecht Family Reunion at Ferron Reservoir! This is a place my dad and his siblings loved to go as children. The tradition continues with cousins and now their children and grandchildren!! The group now numbers in the hundreds. A GREAT family tradition!! Kerm and I have gone for 32 years, missing only one year for his class reunion in California. We took our three kids including a six wee old baby for the first time in 1980!! Such a GREAT tradition!!  While I was undergoing chemo and radiation in the Jan-Feb-March time frame I would lay on the table and think of Ferron.  It was more beautiful than I could think of on that table!

My dad, Neil C Frischknecht was born and raised in Manti,Utah.   We took the kids by the MANTI HOUSE where my dad was actually born!  My Uncle Dean still owns and maintains the MANTI HOUSE.  In fact some of his grandkids were there and we were able to go inside and show the kids the house which has not changed!   My dad would be 94 this year.  Uncle Dean Frischknecht is 92 and still kicking!  Uncle Don Frischknecht will be 88 this year and is still kicking HARD!   It is comforting to know they are still here to continue sharing memories and remind me of my dad!!

At some point in time my mom and dad moved to Ephraim. I lived there until I was 9 years old when we moved to Provo, Utah. My dad's mom was Elda Christensen. She married Wilford Frischknecht and they combined their efforts to run the sheep farm pictured in the Mayfield area. The Frischknechts are one of the biggest sheep raisers in the State of Utah. The farm is well over a century old and continues to this day run by my cousins Joe and Paul Frischknecht. It is a great part of our heritage!! We head to Mayfield to go up 12 mile over the top to the Ferron Reservoir!

We took our three grandchildren, Simone, Lukas and Stella. We had a wonderful time and I would not have missed it for the world!! It is known the reunion occurs every last weekend in July. It is no secret. It is EVERY year!! The family members know. At 9000 feet I had complete Internet access and phone service. Yay for modern technology!!

Today I started round four of the chemo I have decided to continue. I am taking other agents which people claim cure cancer. So with all that I will be a winner. One of my classmates from high school said he saw me in his dreams the other night and I was a winner. I LOVE LOVE that he shared that with me!! With the extra week off my blood counts had come up a little so on with the fanny pack until tomorrow!

I was given a blessing before I went to chemo by my BUBBA! Last time it took two hours to access my port with lots of sticks and then they still had to draw blood from my arm -- the reason I got the port was to avoid arm sticks!!!   When I went  yesterday I told them they got only ONE STICK in my chest. Last time it was more!! She stuck me and could not get the blood. I told my husband "Bubba you gave me a blessing. What's up with that?!". They had me drop and hug my knees and had blood in less than five minutes. So it worked. I am so THANKFUL!!

Today I am feeling pretty normal and I know that if I am to WIN this battle, already knowing that the cancer is gone - I have to PUSH through eacn and every day.  I refuse to give up and I will be that WINNER that I need to be.

I am thankful for the Many Many Prayers offered in my behalf.  My family still needs them.  We pray for all of those that pray for us on a nightly basis.  I feel the love and I KNOW and have FAITH that it works.  I am truly BLESSED.  I have ANGELS attending on this earth and in HEAVEN.  You will NEVER make me think otherwise because I KNOW!!  I FEEL and I BELIEVE!!

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:

"The Trick is NOT How Much Pain You Feel  - -  But How Much JOY you feel.  Any IDIOT Can Feel Pain.  Life Is Full of Excuses to Feel pain, Excuses NOT to LIVE!!....  EXCUSES, EXCUSES, EXCUSES!!"

Remember - We ALL have EXCUSES and Life I Said Before - They are Like Sweat Glands - They ALL STINK!!  I REFUSE To Be An Excuse or Even USE An EXCUSE!  I Choose to have JOY!!

GOD BLESS US ALL!  Love and HUGS!!!!!


Uncle Kasey in the canoe with the KIDS!!



Beautiful Simone - trying her new fishing pole!

Lukas on the left with his cousin Adam Johnson  Uncle Kasey being PATIENT!!



MY BEAUTIFUL PIECE OF HEAVEN!!



The Original Farm still in operation today!

Gramps is the Breakfast CHAMP!  Eggs, bacon, pancakes, juice and milk!  Make my BABIES HAPPY!!  And YES!  That extra plate is MINE!!

Gramps with Beautiful STELLA!  Love that girl!!

FYI,,,,,,I Am NOT Dying.....I Am Becoming a Cancer Survivor!!!!

I have been reminded a couple of times to let people know that I am NOT DYING!!!  I am undergoing treatment for the cancer that I think is GONE!  The treatment, to be honest - SUCKS!!  And where in the world did I ever learn to speak that word?????  Trust me -  I am real and I am going to tell it like it is.  I am NOT DYING!

Last Monday I had my THIRD chemo dose!  Yay for ME!  3/8.  I first go in and they take blood through the port in my chest to see what my blood counts show.  Only problem?  They could not make it work!!  So they finally took it out of my arm - after about two hours!  I then met with Dr. Bott before they decided how to treat me.  Usually you just see hm once a month but he wants to see me every two weeks because of my reactions to the STUFF!  We had an honest, frank discussion about introducing the OXILIPLATIN again.  The course consists of the OXILIPLATIN, 5 FU, and Leukovorin.  After our discussion and the symptoms I had and continue to have because of that FIRST treatment, we have decided that I will not take the OXILIPLATIN again.  YAY!  Made my day.  To be honest thought, I did not sleep much Sunday night.  I KNOW that I am in CHARGE of myself and my treatment, but I also want to be that SURVIVOR I am talking about. 

Can I tell you what has helped me so much???    Playing WORDS WITH FRIENDS on my iphone!!   I love that game.  I also think that it helps your brain stimulation, especially through the middle of the night.  My friend Dave Craig sent me an instant message that night asking why I was still awake because we were playing the game.  I told him I could not sleep because of what COULD happen to me in the morning.  We played until about 3 am.  It helped me so much and I love him for that.  He honestly DOUBLES my score every single time I play him but its all fun and takes my mind off stuff late at night!!  I play with my friend KayLynn and my nephews and really people all over the world!!  I LOVE IT!!

After the visit with the doctor you go to a chair for your HOOK UPS!  First they give you an anti-nausea medicine which takes about 20 minutes to drip in.  The medicine lasts for approximately 30 hours.  Then the Leukovorin is introduced into the line and that takes about 2 1/2 hours.  At the end a Bolus of 5 FU is pushed into the line and then comes that trusty FANNY PACK!  It has the pump with the rest of the 5 FU that takes until Wednesday to run out.  Wednesday I go back and out comes the line that has been pumping that STUFF into the port in my chest.  I do pretty well Monday and Tuesday and even into Wednesday.  I mean I feel nausea, tired, and all of that but it is doable because of PILLS!!  I love those PILLS!!  Wednesday after the pump comes off comes the Nausea, feeling like I have a UTI, not to mention the yeast I have not only in my mouth but ALL over!   Don't let me forget about the moutoh sores!!   So YES - I love those PILLS!  A nausea pill, a UTI pill, a yeast pill!  Seriously?  I HATE pills and have never been a pill popper but at night comes the Benadryl -  not for allergies - FOR SLEEP!!  By Thursday that is pretty much a stay close to the bed day.  I get up and get ready and do the CHORES I need to do around the house but it is a sick sick sick day.  Friday getting a little better and by Saturday I do pretty well! 

You then have the WHOLE next week to feel better and to get ready to start all over again!  Because of my FAMILY REUNION next week, I get that week off!  YAY - An extra week to feel even better!!  Cannot Wait because this summer we are pretty much on STAYCATIONS!!   Not much of a vacation THIS YEAR! 

Saturday was my 59th Birthday!  When did I get so OLD???  I don't feel 59!  Well kind of on those Chemo weeks but in my mind I am still 18.  I act like I am still 18 - EXCEPT  those chemo days!  I was COMPLETELY overwhelmed by the hundreds of birthday wishes from ALL over the world.  I am truly appreciative.

I had lunch yesterday with some of my girl friends.  My friend Martsy asked how I make it through each day.  My friend Ann's husband has had his share of health issues and it was an interesting discussion to say the least!  The bottom line is THIS.....

We ALL have our struggles.  Yes - I am going through struggles right now.  But at night when I go to bed I give THANKS for my BLESSINGS.  I give THANKS for being able to have made it through that day!  I have NEVER one time asked WHY ME?   I say WHY NOT?   This is something I can handle.  I HATE it!  Let me throw this in - When my kids were growing up that was a word NOT allowed in our home!  It is a nasty word but it is the only way I can express how I feel without swearing - which I have been know to do OCCASIONALLY!  I HATE cancer.  I HATE the treatment.  I HATE that I am doing this but I also want to LIVE!  I Know so many people who have it WORSE.  I have two nieces and three nephews who lost their dads early in their lives.  They have overcome the loss and have moved on to lead AMAZING lives and they DID IT and are DOING IT.  I have a niece who has never walked.  When she was four months old she was given a WRONG SHOT!!  She has lived almost 30 years in her wheelchair.  I am thankful I can walk.  I am thankful for her because she has shown ALL of us how to live with beauty and grace.  She is productive and leads a productive life!   What an AMAZING example! 

 I could go on and on.  It is just like LIFE!   There will always be those who are richer, smarter and better looking that YOU (or ME).  There will always be those who have it WORSE than any of us.  It is HOW WE HANDLE what we have been dealt with!  Cup half full - cup half empty?   We can blame and feel sorry for ourselves or we can take charge, KICK BUTT and lead our lives without blaming others.  It is a CHOICE that EACH AND EVERYONE of us makes on a daily basis.  We make a CHOICE as to how we will act, react and serve others.  I cannot tell you enough times - It is the SERVICE we do for others that will really really count when we finally meet our MAKER!

So wake up each day - serve one another-  Pray for who you can help.  Whether you believe in prayer or not - I can tell you that I KNOW without a doubt it HELPS!  Pray for inspiration as to who you can help and who you can serve.  I PROMISE!   You will feel like a MILLION BUCKS!

Thank you for ALL who have served and continue to serve me.  Please know that even in my weakened state, I pray daily for who I can serve and I do service every day of my life.  It makes it ALL worth it and makes me feel like I said - a MILLION BUCKS!  Please continue to pray for me and my family.  We NEED all the prayers that can be sent up!  Please know - I am NOT dying.  I am surviving and I am HAPPY and I am THANKFUL and Count my BLESSINGS each and every day!

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:   With the death of Stephen Covey, who I have met on several occasions and have spent time in his home, I will use one of his quotes!  I LOVE IT 

"To Touch the Soul of Another Human Being is to Walk on Holy Ground".  

This is what I am talking about.  Serve and help one another.  Pray for those who need prayers.  Mourn with those who mourn.  Bear the burdens of one another!  Live your life without REGRETS!    Love and HUGS from ME to ALL OF YOU!!  THANK YOU!

The Second Round....

I MOWED the front lawn today!  Big deal you say?   Yes - it is a BIG DEAL!  I have waited PATIENTLY to have the ENERGY to be able to mow.  I tried last week and I was too weak!  Mowing is my therapy.   My MIND feels like a MILLION BUCKS!!  Ha!  My body feels pretty darn good too!!  I am THANKFUL.  I am GRATEFUL.  It is a BLESSING to have a lawn to mow!!  The front usually takes me a half hour.  Today I had to stop halfway for just a LITTLE rest and to be honest - my CALENDAR isn't  what one would consider FULL!!  I have all the time in the world!!  I am bound and determined to not let this CANCER thing KICK me!  I definitely KICKED BUTT today!!

I laid awake Saturday evening until well after midnight. I was overjoyed when my phone showed the change from June 30th to July 1st! I made it through June! The days were agonizingly LONG! I have never been one to wish the time away - always working hard and taking advantage of the beauty of each new day. Funny how perspective changes when you are merely trying to survive! Don't get me wrong. I roll out of my water bed each morning come H E L L or high-water.  And honestly - it is a ROLL!!  I get dressed and apply makeup. Some days just doing that requires a small rest back on the bed!   By the way.... I make the bed the minute I get up for the FIRST time... Lest anyone thinks me lazy! HA!

The second round of chemo was Monday June 25th.  After hearing the horror stories from my first treatment with the BAD medicine - the doctor decided not to use that particular medicine in the COCKTAIL!  I didn't even have to BEG!   You sit there for 2-3 hours while some of the STUFF infuses into the port.  Then they give you the trusty fanny pack with the pump to continue pumping the STUFF into your poor, broken down body until Wednesday.  I did OK.  It causes nausea and all the joints that I had trouble with the first time - ached like crazy.  Wednesday when they took it off the overwhelming feeling of fatigue and nausea hits.  I was pretty good by the weekend.  My right hand who happens to be one of my best friends, is still messed up from the first time.  I go again Monday the 9th.  I hope to be able to just continue like last time.  I don't want the BAD STUFF!!

It was a beautiful week this week.  The moon was beautiful.  The 4th of July is  my all time favorite HOLIDAY!   It is a great time when MOST of my family members, siblings, their children, etc. gather for the festivities.  A FRISCHKNECHT FAMILY tradition is staying overnight on the parade route on July 3rd.  This year was no different.  We have our FAVORITE spot and several of the nieces and nephews save the SPOT and the rest of us get there in the morning. Honestly - I don't care about the parade.  It is all the other stuff that continues the TRADITION!!  So THANKFUL!    Kerm and I were out there until about midnight and came home.  I cannot tell you how many times I have slept (there is NO sleep )out there.  I have made a promise that next year I will lead the sleepover!  After that we had about 60 people for the PICNIC at our house.  We are close and our house is the place for the July party!  So much fun, great food and such GREAT people.  I love them ALL!! 

My brother Kurt Frischknecht passed away June 22, 2002.  This was the ten year anniversary. I cannot believe how FAST the time has gone  and how much I miss him.  I can hear his voice in my head.  He had a FAVORITE name for me - ever since he was little.  Each time he would call I was greeted with that name!   His wife Cheryl remarried a couple of years later.  She was left with four small children and she married RIC MCCUTCHEON!  How I love that Man!  He is MY BROTHER and I love him to pieces!  He came to the marriage with his two sons - Chase and Chance who lived with him.  Together they created a blended family - the likes of which I have NEVER seen.  I pay tribute to both Cheryl and Ricky!  I love them so much and they come and continue the traditions!  I love that family!

To be honest I had a little let down after everyone left Thursday.  I had looked so forward to this week and now I just have to keep finding things to look forward to so the time passes quickly.  The last weekend in July is ALWAYS the FRISCHKNECHT FAMILY REUNION at FERRON RESERVOIR!  This is my dad's family.  He had five siblings - he still has two living brothers - their children and grandchildren and now great grandchildren.  That is next on my agenda and I look forward to that.  I WILL be camping with a motorhome - I decided a few years ago NO MORE tents for ME!  Now for SURE - NO MORE TENTS!  We will take the grandkids and enjoy time on the lake, four wheelers and FAMILY!  By the way - those of you who are not planning on going - CHANGE YOUR MINDS and get there!!!!!

My perspective regarding LIFE has changed.  When we were coming home Tuesday evening at midnight from the SPOT - we turned from University Avenue in Provo up to 800 North in Orem.  A truck had gone around the corner too fast and lost his load - a P IANO!  It was smashed to pieces!  We drove slowly past and my heart went out to those folks.  I wanted to turn around and talk to them - to let them know that the piano was just a THING!  Of course it would be devastating to lose your piano but in the scheme of things - it is just a THING!   It is the people and relationships that really matter.  I have learned so much for which I am eternally GRATEFUL!

THANK YOU for your prayers in my behalf of ME and my FAMILY.  We still need them!  We have had many challenges which we are slowly overcoming.  I believe in PRAYER and I KNOW they WORK!  I FEEL it!

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  
When you Doubt the Lovely Silence of a Quiet Wooded Place,
When you Doubt the Path of Silver of Some Moonlit Water Space,
When you Doubt the Winds a Blowing,
Flash of Lightening, Glistening Rain, Sun or Starlit Heavens Above You,
On the Land or Bounding Main.
When you Doubt the Sleep of Loved Ones Deep Beneath some Precious Sod,
Listen to a Soft Voice Saying - "BE STILL - and KNOW that I am GOD"

LOVE AND  HUGS TO ALL!!  THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT - I FEEL IT!!!!

MY NIGHTMARE WEEK.......

Kerm is telling me I need to write down the events of this week before I forget!  HA!!!!   I will NEVER forget!  I have said all along that I would be frankly honest.  AND - those of you who know me REALLY well know that I always call it like it is. 

I know today is Saturday.  I cannot tell you what happened really to the days in between my last post which was Sunday.  I know that Monday morning I was at the imaging center to have CT scans of my lungs and liver.  The scans were CLEAR - which was what I had hoped for - but until you HEAR the real news - You can't know for SURE!  I then went upstairs to the Oncology Department for my first of EIGHT treatments - every other Monday.  I knew what side effects could happen to me and I was prepared.  Tell me how can one EVER prepare for TERRIBLE, AWFUL and ICKY???????

They drew my blood work through the PORT in my chest.  When all that came back fairly normal (remember I had surgery four weeks prior) they came back with the STUFF - the DRUGS that are needed evidently for a CURE!  Actually I had no cancer in any of 24 lymph nodes.  The six weeks of chemo and radiation that I went through during Jan, Feb and March basically shrunk the tumor to NOTHING and then for asurety - they took a foot of colon!  Just to make SURE!!!

I am not - nor will I ever be the ONLY person in the world to have chemotherapy.  I sat there and EVERY SINGLE chair was FULL with cancer patients getting DRIPS of DRUGS!  It is FREEZING in there and everyone has blankets and coverings on them because it is so COLD!   I forgot my Relief Society Blanket.  I LOVE my Relief Society Blanket.  The ladies in my ward made it for me and I use it every day of  my life!  I called over to the Surgical Center where my sister Jill Andrews is Administrator and asked if they would bring me some HOT blankets from the warmer.  Kelli - who I absolutely love and adore ran immediately over with blankets for Kerm and I.  They were so warm and felt so good.  While I was sitting there my right hand got really cold and starting CONTORTING!   If you have ever had CONTORTIONS then you will know what I mean.  It was like my fingers had charly horses in them and they would stiffen out and stay stiff and I could not move them without tremendous pain.  Little did I know that today, Saturday, I would still be feeling those effects!

They drip the really NASTY stuff in which takes about two hours or so - then they get the trusty fanny pack out and put in the 5FU in a pump which is the present you GET to go home with - Until Wednesday.  I know we went back Wednesday to get the pump off but honestly - I do not remember - it is a huge BLUR!.  I felt pretty good going home Monday but felt nauseated so I laid down.  I know I got up Wednesday to go back to get the pump off but I did not GET UP until this morning. 

The contortions started with my right hand - MY EVERYTHING hand!  In the beginning they asked if I did HAND things - such as playing the piano - crocheting, etc.  I PLAY PIANO every day of my life and I had just purchased a bunch of yarn to make an afghan for my Kamie.  And in fact, I took it with to hopefully work on it while I was sitting there for those hours.  Ya - so much for THAT!

The contortions soon started all over my body.  From the beginning to touch anything cold or drink anything cold caused a big tingling/hurt sensation.  I could handle that.  I drank warm juice and warm water.  I will tell you this - by today (SATURDAY) it has been so hard to quench my thirst.  I drink over 64 ounces a day but the thirst is not quenchable.  Today I decided to put ice in my water.  It is a weird sensation in your mouth but the throat feels like it is constricting and just feels sore.  Cold water tasted SO GOOD!  Don't ever take that for granted!!!   It is a huge blessing to be NORMAL!! 

My feet, my ankles, my toes, my lips, my eyes, my arms and basically all my muscles CONTORTED!  I cried more this week than I have in  YEARS!!!!!!!!!   That hurt too - I had to really work hard to NOT cry because it hurt so bad.  It was hard to walk.  My calves were so sore that I could just get up and down - I could not go far.  The WORST??????  My right hand!  The hand that is my best friend because I use it the MOST!   I couldn't really hold anything in it - it would spasm and go into STUPID CONTORTIONS!!

By Wednesday they prescribed some XANAX for me - which is an anti-anxiety drug.  It wasn't so much that I was ANXIOUS but that they hoped it would calm down my muscles.  The nausea was FAR WORSE than the nausea I had during my chemo and radiation in the spring.

The days have been LONG!  I didn't see some of the days.  I didn't see outside.  Before I knew it it was dark and I welcome the dark because I knew I wouldn't have to toss and turn - that I could take some BENADRYL and a little XANAX and I would SLEEP!  I welcomed the sleep.  During the days it was HOT!  The air conditioning gets so COLD - COLD affects you more and causes more symptoms.  I laid on my bed with my BLANKET and tossed and turned.  I did not eat much - food is way OVERRATED - HA!!  NOT TRUE!  I cannot wait to eat today. I had a little this morning but we are going to BAJIO and we always just share a salad but GOSH - it sounds so good.  Kerm is ready to leave as soon as I am finished with this.

My dad, Neil Frischknecht got his PhD in Botany.  All of dad's kids have ALWAYS prided themselves with beautiful yards.  Last year we had a wedding Reception in our yard and it was so beautiful.  This year I have not planted one flower.  I have a walkway up to my front door and it is always alive with beautiful flowers and sitting in the rocking chairs on the front porch has always been such a JOY!  I walked out this morning - the first time all week and was AWESTRUCK!  My walk had been planted with LARGE flowers that are ready to bloom.  It had been weeded - something I have not been able to do.  I have always done the yard and It is THERAPY to me.  Kerm left this morning to go coach his coach pitch team.  He is the coach for our grandson Lukas.  There bright and early was my friend CATHY METTEN!  She has been my friend for 50 YEARS!  She had come early and to my COMPLETE SURPRISE planted my walkway with flowers.  My heart is overwhelmed.  I could not even speak because I was crying!  How thankful I am for friends and neighbors who have been so good to me. 

There were flowers yesterday from Kelsi and John and Charlotte.  Flowers today for Annalee who lives in my neighborhood.  The Christensen's and Stasinos' live on either side of us.  They both have chickens and have kept us in fresh eggs.  Kelsi has chickens and has brought me eggs from time to time.  Scranbled eggs taste really good to me.  It is a food that the taste doesn't change for me with these awful drugs!  I am humbled beyond anything ever before.  I am GRATEFUL.  I am BLESSED!

My body reacts TERRIBLY! The radiation gave me severe full thickness burns.  These new chemotherapy drugs have caused SEVERE reactions in my body.  I completed one course of 8 total.  Every other week.  I will speak with the oncologist and ask to have these drugs modified for me.  I CANNOT do this again.  I AM STRONG!  And I also KNOW that each treatment gets cumulatively worse!  I CANNOT do worse.  So hopefully they will modify my course of treatment.  I think they will because the cancer was NOT in any lymph nodes and at surgery ALL the margins were clear.

I do feel BLESSED.  I am feeling a little better today.  I do FEEL like I cannot get any worse than this treatment was.  So here's to hoping they will modify my treatment and I can make it through.

Thank you for thoughts, flowers, notes, EVERYTHING!  The week has been a BLUR!  I know it is summer - the cherries are EARLY and I walked out today to some PURPLE cherries!  There are PLENTY!

I do need prayers.  I feel them and I am THANKFUL.  Please hang with me a little longer and keep praying for me. 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  All I can say today is COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS.  We ALL have them.  Please ENJOY every minute of good HEALTH!  DO NOT EVER take it for granted.  GET YOUR CHECK UPS!   A check up may just save your life!   LIFE is so PRECIOUS and VALUABLE!  I WANT TO LIVE!!!!   I HAVE WORK TO DO!!  I CANNOT DO IT THIS SICK SO I HAVE TO GET BETTER!!!   I CANNOT WAIT!     Love and HUGS to EVERYONE!

HALFWAY THROUGH......

Today is a BEAUTIFUL Sunday in Orem, Utah.  It is only 64 degrees at 2:30 in the afternoon but the sun is shining and it is beautiful!  We went to Church this morning and today was the first time in weeks that I taught the Young Single Adults. I LOVE them and I love teaching.  I didn't stay for the third hour!  ONE STEP at a time!!

I saw Dr. Bott, The Oncologist on Friday afternoon.  Friday was four weeks since my surgery.  Each week I feel like I have turned a corner.  I can honestly say I ALMOST feel normal.  My energy is still lacking because it is hard to get nourishment - and I am actually eating A LOT!!  HA HA - for the FIRST time in my life - I can eat absolutely ANYTHING I want and still go down almost a half pound a day!  I have lost almost 20 pounds and like I tell everyone - It is a HARD way to lose weight! 

Dr. Bott has determined that I am ready to begin the last chemotherapy treatments.  I will start tomorrow, June 11th.  It has been six months now since my CT scans, etc. of my liver and lungs - which by-the-way showed NO cancer.  So tomorrow at 9 am I will have CT scans and then head to the Oncology Department for the beginning of my final round of chemotherapy.  There are a total of three drugs which will be infused.  On Monday I will sit there for ths first infusion which lasts about 3 hours.  They will then send me home with my trusty FANNY PACK (Good luck cause I have no FANNY LEFT) which will have the rest of the chemo being to\pumped through the port in my chest until Wednesday when they will take the pump off.  I will then have 11 days to recover and will return on Monday June 25th for the SAME THING!  I have to do this for 8-12 treatments which will take 4-6 months.  Because there was no lymph node involvement I have already made the decision that I will go the 4 months.  I will then have a month to recover and will have the final surgery to reconnect EVERYTHING!  I am on the countdown.  Each day is one day closer to being FINISHED.  I actually consider myself MORE than half way through because supposedly the chemo combined with the radiation is harder than what I am going to have to go through and the 8 hour surgery was the WORST!  The next surgery is about an hour.  So here I go.

 I have heard all sorts of HORROR stories about this next chemotherapy treatment.  I read the side effects and truly FREAKED out!   Last time I had only the one drug which is called 5-FU.  I have to laugh.  What a name for a cancer drug!  I did OK with that and only had a little bit of nausea.  This time there are THREE drugs involved.  One is more of the 5FU - the other is Leucovorin which is a reduced folic acid and actually works with the other drugs to ENHANCE the effectiveness.  Great - I for SURE want to enhance that effectiveness!  GOSH!!!  The third drug is called Oxaliplatin.  That is the BAD one!  They say it is used in cancer which has metastasized but MINE HAS NOT!!!  So I don't know WHY I have to do this - only that they say it is BEST!  I will follow the instructions because I WANT TO LIVE!   I DO NOT want to do any of this.  But I want to live and in my mind I HAVE TO DO IT!!  The side effects of this drug are awful!They do say however, that these side effects are ALMOST always reversible and will go away after treatment!  WHATEVER! 

There is peripheral neuropathy  which is numbness and tingling and cramping of the hands or feet often triggered by cold.  These symptoms will generally lessen or go away between treatments HOWEVER - as the number of treatments increase the numbness and tingling will take longer to lessen or go away!  Nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, mouth sores, low blood counts, fatigue and LOSS OF APPETITE!  Great!  I have heard that you cannot drink anything COLD at all and remember - we are in the SUMMER MONTHS!  I can handle this part because I can drink warm water and keep my juices in small cans that I can consume without having to refrigerate.  If you were to open a refrigerator WITHOUT GLOVES it would feel like your hands are burning!  I mean NO COLD at all.  If you drink cold stuff it will feel as if your throat is closing off and you cannot get air.  They TELL ME that this is ONLY a feeling - what they don't know is that if that happens to me - I will have a PANIC attack!  If there is anyone who has had this drug please let me know how you have done with it.  I will outline my journey HONESTLY and tell the whole STORY! 

With that being said I am GRATEFUL.  I am THANKFUL.  I am so HAPPY to be feeling so much better and doing NORMAL things AGAIN!   We had Simone, Lukas and Stella yesterday afternoon and took them to the Orem Summerfest which was a lot of fun.  It was however FREEZING with blowing winds so we only stayed a couple of hours.  We had a GREAT sleepover last night and it felt normal and fun!  We did not ask yet for Charlotte for the night because she needs to hang close to her mama right now.  Eventually we hope she gets to join our sleepovers!  I LOVE LOVE LOVE these babies!  Oh my gosh - They are truly my REASON for LIVING!!!  For WANTING to LIVE!.  I am THANKFUL!

It is interesting because my blog talks about Angels attending me through this journey and I need to tell you this is the TRUTH!  I have ANGELS who are watching out for me - who help bless my life and help me through hard times.  For this experience - I am ETERNALLY GRATEFUL!   I ALSO KNOW that I have ANGELS on the other side of the VEIL who are attending me!  I feel their presence - I feel the love and I am GRATEFUL!  I feel very blessed.

What I will ask now is this - PLEASE PRAY HARD FOR ME - AND my family!  I  know it seems like such a selfish thing for me to ask but I NEED your prayers.  I need help going through these next few months!.  Please continue putting my name on the Temples where you are.  I KNOW with assurance that it WORKS.  I feel the power of prayer in my life and it is very HUMBLING.

THANK YOU - EVERYONE.  Thank you for your kindnesses, your kind thoughts and notes and EVERYTHING.  I am TRULY APPRECIATIVE!  Kerm and I pray hard for those we know who are undergoing difficulties.  If you know someone who needs help or prayers - please let us know. 

I will be a SURVIVOR.  I DO NOT WANT to go through the next few months but my reward will be HAPPY HOLIDAYS!  They will be here BEFORE we know it!  I will update and outline my journey.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:  "Your Ship is Equal to the Load of TODAY; but When You are Carrying Yesterday's Worry and Tomorrow's Anxiety, You Must Lighten Your Load or You will SINK" 

I am trying to take this one day at a time.  That is the ONLY way I can do it.  It is mind boggling to think of the weeks I have to go.  I can do this - ONE DAY AT A TIME!    Love and Hugs to EVERYONE!

PAYING TRIBUTE.....

This is the Memorial Day Week!  I have been overcome with emotion as I thought of ALL the people I need to pay tribute to!  I am so THANKFUL to live in this country - where we enjoy many freedoms!  I am THANKFUL to those who have fought and continue to fight in this never ending quest for freedom!  My dad, Neil C. Frischknecht fought in World War II as did  many of my uncles.  My dad was an officer in the Navy serving on the USS Chester.  I am THANKFUL for the COURAGE the men and women display each and every day as they serve this GREAT country.  My belief is that our country is in great danger of losing some of those freedoms! We ALL need to work hard to select good leaders - leaders who will take us on the pathways we need to be on to ensure those freedoms we DESERVE!   GOD BLESS AMERICA!  GOD BLESS US ALL!!

I was released from the Huntsman Cancer Hospital on Wednesday May 16th.  I came home and immediately started doing the things I am normally accustomed to doing.  It was plain and simply TOO MUCH!  We went to dinner Saturday the 19th and I flippantly stated that "it's hard to keep a good girl down".  It IS hard to keep a good girl down BUT....  A good girl should KNOW when too much is too much!!  Probably the hardest thing EVER is having to rest a lot and watch others MOW MY LAWNS!!  It is such a great therapeutic release for me to work in the yard and for years and years, other than spraying the fruit trees, fixing sprinklers and some help with weeding - I have done the yard work!  I have not yet planted my flowers but it is still wonderful sitting in the beautiful yard!  I LOVE IT!

I am doing a lot better.  Each day there is improvement.  I am slowly gaining back my strength and stamina.  I continue to lose weight as it is hard to keep nourishment in my body.  I go down about a half pound a DAY!  HA - this is a weight loss program I WOULD NOT recommend.  I am adjusting to all the NEW things and feel like I have a grip on my life!  I saw Dr. Sklow for my two week follow up last Thursday and he does not want to see me until I am finished with the new round of chemo in the fall.  It will then be time to reconnect everything and get this PORT out of my chest!  I CANNOT wait!  It is going to be a long summer.  I see Dr. Bott on Friday June 8th.  I am assuming I will start chemo Monday June 11th.  My friend who is going through the same course I will be undergoing says it is a great WEIGHT LOSS program.  She has a lot of nausea and finds it difficult to find anything that sounds good to eat!  I am hopeful that I can take enough antinausea medicine to keep myself going!  As with my last round of chemotherapy, this type of treatment may thin the hair - I won't lose it!

There are so many people to pay TRIBUTE to this week.  It is hard to know where to start.  First and foremost, I am THANKFUL and BLESSED to have a great family!  I love them so much!  I cannot begin to express my LOVE and APPRECIATION for their SUPPORT.  My Brothers and Sisters have stayed in touch with me and have been concerned for my welfare.  This has been such a hard thing to go through.  I am trying to do it with grace and dignity but it is still very HARD!  It was during the past week that I really felt like a CANCER PATIENT!  UGH!  When I saw Dr. Sklow last week however, he said my disease is 100% curable and that if I do the last bit of chemo I should live a great life!  I WILL heed his advice!  He is the EXPERT - and I LOVE him!

I am THANKFUL for my husband.  He has been by my side through this whole NIGHTMARE!  I cannot begin to imagine going through something like this alone.  If you or someone you know is ever alone in this battle please let me know.  I will BE THERE for anyone who needs me.  I am thankful for my children.  My girls have been so amazing.  I am brought to tears just thinking about how supportive they have been to me.  I love them so much.  Kamie and Mike flew out again over the weekend so I was able to see her two times in two weeks.  Kelsi and John AND Charlotte had us all to dinner while Kamie was here.   Makes a mama's heart feel so GREAT!  My oldest son Kasey had a cornea transplant during this time and spent a few nights at our home while he was recovering.  One night there we sat - Kerm who had a headache, Kasey with a transplanted cornea and a sore eye and ME - getting over surgery.  Kasey said it reminded him of a MASH episode! 

I pay TRIBUTE to Beckie Davis.  I have known her for many years and though we live in the same homes, we have been in and out of same wards at different times.  How GRATEFUL am I that she is currently in my ward.  She is am amazing, positive, brilliant lady who has helped me SO MUCH!  She is a wound care nurse at Utah Valley Hospital.  She has come over to help me SEVERAL times when I have been stuck and for that I am eternally grateful!  I know she is there for me and I am humbled by her help to me!  She is truly an ANGEL on earth who is in my life and who I NEED!!!  There are OTHER ANGELS to whom I pay tribute.  You know who you are!  I LOVE YOU!

I am THANKFUL for FRIENDS who have been so incredibly supportive to me.  Friends from all over the world.  The notes and messages mean so much to me.  I am THANKFUL for those who have brought in food and have offered such great support to us.  Every little act of kindness means so much.  THANK YOU!

I pay TRIBUTE to Haley and Chase McCormick.  Haley is the oldest daughter of my brother Kurt Frischknecht who died tragically ten years ago in a horrific car accident.  I miss him so much!  I can still hear his voice in my head calling my name! When he passed away he left his wife and four small children behind - Haley being the oldest, sister Daryn, brother Blake and brother Kade.  Kade turned 3 the day after his daddy passed away.  Haley and Chase have been married two years and have been the residents of our basement apartment.  They are AMAZING young leaders who have touched the lives of MANY!  Haley has been here with me through many hard times during the past 2 1/2 years.  I can honestly say she has been my right hand LADY!  She is wise FAR beyond her years and together they are simply an AMAZING couple.  She graduated from BYU a year ago and Chase is now completing his work at UVU.  They will be MOVING ON very soon and I will miss them GREATLY!   During the past two weeks they have been HUGELY supportive and loving to me.  Kerm and Kasey had to leave for Penn State for several days after I was released from the hospital.  I was comforted by the mere presence of this great couple!  I LOVE them and will serve them for the rest of my life! 

I would urge EVERYONE to NEVER take life for granted!  Life is precious - Life is great - If anyone is struggling please contact me.  I will help you in any way possible!  Take every precaution to maintain good health!  Get your CHECK UPS!  They SAVE lives!  I am THANKFUL that my STRENGTH is returning.  I pray for STRENGTH.  We all have our ups and downs and each and everyone of us has our STRUGGLES!   Struggles are stepping stones - learning experiences that get us closer to our ultimate goal of one day returning to our GOD!  I pray for STRENGTH!!

Please continue to pray for me.  I am still recovering and it will take some time.  I still get shots in my stomach every day which is SICK!  I HATE shots!  Especially in my stomach!!  I need all the prayers I can get in my behalf.  I am THANKFUL for the prayers and support in my behalf.  Please pray for my family!  Keep my  name on the prayer rolls.  I FEEL the support.  I know it works!

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:   "The Really HAPPY Person is the One Who Can Enjoy The Scenery When He HAS To Take A Detour!"!  I have had to take a DETOUR on my life path.  I am HAPPY though because I KNOW that I will soon be back on track.  STAY HAPPY!   LOVE AND HUGS TO ALL!